This week I saw a Luna ad on TV. I'm sure it wasn't the first time I thought of calling them. But it was the first time I focused on the part of the ad with the phone number, not just the jingle but the actual blocky numbers on the screen. The next day I dialed and requested an estimate.
Back story. A month earlier, I had heard from an old college friend that he needed someone to do some art restoration. I happily offered to take in the work. He just started working near my office and so it was easy for him to pop by and drop it off. He suggested we get lunch. Without hesitation I said yes. We talked about the old days, we joked about all the people we used to know, where they are now, and I remember he said that he's more interested in the "now," like what I'm currently doing with my life. It was a cool little nudge to break away from the nostalgia trip I was stuck in. Our conversation instantly got more interesting. We've grown a lot, it seems, just in the last few years, and we agreed that now in our 40's we are more secure and happy, choosing our partners and friends and work, rather than bouncing around searching like we did in our 20's and 30's. He talked a lot about his improv experience, and I started naming names, since I've known a lot of (maybe my favorite) friends over the years who had ties to improv. In recent months I've had many conversations about improv comics and started paying much more attention to the specific people I like in the business. Even joked about how my best friend and I should take classes. Something always told me that's where I fit in best, even though I myself feel to shy to "perform," except around my closest friends and family.
Anyway, after our lunch I had a strange sense of confirmation that there was a reason I gravitated to that group of actors/improv'ers in college. And now.
So Luna sends me Steve, who happens to live a couple miles away in the same town. Right away we get to talking about how this is his day job, how he's about to get his pilot picked up by Amazon. So many strange coincidences after having just talked to my college friend. They've both auditioned for similar roles at the same audition company near my office. Almost as if I gave the green light for the universe to send me more of the thing I know and like, and he literally arrived at my door. He's not the person I want to partner with. That was pretty clear. But something tells me he had a purpose in showing up.
Or was this just a really talented salesman who saw how easily he could bend my artistic, romantic sensibilities, and make a nice commission along the way?
No, this is about me choosing. I neglected my needs for years, put off making choices so I could reserve funds and emotional energy. I'm learning to choose what I like every day, and push away what I don't. I'm discarding clutter so I'm not distracted by all the garbage that's gotten in my way.
We negotiated. He made his sale. And we kept talking. And he told me about his spiritual beliefs. And we got to talking about laws of attraction, and how he believes he manifested his dreams of working in television by way of his interactions with "psychic mediums," which I admit is pretty kooky. He belongs to a "church" where he practices this kind of new age-y faith in asking the universe for healing and guidance. I can't help but like that, it's what I'm after too. Aren't we all. But he told me about an exercise in which you focus on a particular thing, like, he gave me the example of "waffles." If you continually focus and wish and pray on that idea, he says it will find its way to you. He says he tried it, and in a subtle, yet obvious way, he got his sign in the form of a plate of waffles being pushed across the table. He assured me it will work if I try it.
After he left I had a throbbing headache. I felt anxious and over stimulated. Perhaps his ADD was too much for my empathic brain. I couldn't stop the spiraling thoughts and slept badly. I was trying to think of a thing I wanted to manifest. Words kept coming to mind, but each thing I conjured had so many frightening connotations. Rocket, for one, kept coming to mind. And Money. Who wouldn't want to manifest money. But for some reason I felt like choosing Money would come at the expense of losing a loved one, like an inheritance. That's too risky, I don't want money in exchange for losing someone. I'd rather be poor. I decided a bird or flower would be more innocuous. But not an obvious bird or flower, like the ones I see on my table at work or in the bushes or in Michael's backyard.
I chose Gladiolus.
Lately I'm very fond of and grateful for my dad. And many years ago I remember my mom saying glads were his favorite flower. It's not a spring flower, so it would be a stretch to see one in nature. So, here it is, my carefree and whimsical request from you, Universe. Show me some glads.
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